Respite Care Provides Buffer Between Demanding Patients And Overworked Kinship Caregivers

Kinship caregivers have the option to avail themselves of respite care to get some time to get away from the home where they are providing loving support to their ailing or failing family members....

Kinship caregivers have the option to avail themselves of respite care to get some time to get away from the home where they are providing loving support to their ailing or failing family members. The sometimes overlooked function of respite care is also that it provides a buffer between demanding patients and overworked kinship caregivers. The relationship between the caregiver and the patient is not always as harmonious as one would like to believe and even though the caregiver will do anything in her or his power to make things go well for everyone involved, sometimes a patient is so frustrated with his failing health that this frustration will spill over into the relationship and actually cause severe damage in the familial interactions.

Incidents of elder abuse have placed a stigma on some caregivers but the tales of elderly abuse are rarely – if ever – told. These are the occasions where the patient is spiteful, angry, frustrated, becoming demented, and maybe is not properly treated and as a result venting the anger and frustration at the only person who will be around to take it all in: the kinship caregiver. There are incidents of food being purposefully dropped onto the floor, feces thrown at the caregiver; purses are turned upside down, car keys hidden, and threats are made. In some cases the caregiver is hoping for a change in the behavior while in others the individual feels trapped with the senior who is becoming more vengeful.

Respite care provides the necessary outlet for the help required by such a kinship caregiver. It is not enough to have the little time out, sometimes it helps to have an independent third party take in the situation and make recommendations. In some cases this might require a change in the treatment protocol while in other cases it may be the time to institutionalize the patient who is unwilling or unable to cope with the changes her life is undergoing. This becomes even more crucial now that people are living longer and are going to be more than ever dependent on the kindness of family members. Willingness to help out usually is not the problem but when it comes to a long term care situations, the elderly patient may suddenly revert to a behavior that is borderline destructive.

In some cases this leads to false charges of elder abuse being leveled against caregivers when a patient presents with bruises that might have been self inflicted or stem from an unrelated incident, such as a fall. When the kinship caregiver finds himself trapped in such a situation it is often due to a failure to have an outlet. Even as respite care workers are available, the caregiver may be hesitant to invite them into the home for fear of having the patient make false accusations about the caregiver in his absence. Of course, deflecting this kind of behavior at the onset is the wisest course of action and the idea of enlisting the help of a respite caregiver early on in the care arrangement is the best option possible. After all, with the buffer between the demanding patients and overworked kinship caregivers in place early on, the odds of preventing an escalation are greatly in your favor.

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